“Do Right”
When we stop identifying with our thoughts, we can create space for ourselves. In that space, we find power, not to react, but to respond, and even, create. One of life's best lessons is to learn to pause and slow our thinking before responding. To illustrate, I have a personal and relatable story I can share.
“Do Right”
Living in Virginia, the state made it very easy for residents to personalize their car plates. I was once pulled over for speeding. At the time, my license plate read “DO RIGHT.” I know—ironic, right?
The phrase originated from a college coach I once played for and a mentor who often said it after a victory, when he would say, "Men, go out tonight, celebrate, have fun, but remember to DO RIGHT.” It stuck with me. I believed in it as a way of life. But believing in something and living it are two different things.
The truth is, I didn’t always see myself as “doing wrong.” I could justify most of my actions, even when they weren’t the best choices. Remember, we know what we know. One of my most significant issues in my early work life was running late. I always had something else to do, and distractions came easily to me. Focus didn’t.
Even though I meant to “Do Right,” I wasn’t always aware of how I was living. My mind moved quickly, so I was constantly pressing the gas pedal hard, both inside and outside of me, without realizing it, and I got pulled over frequently. I always had a story ready, a good reason. But I wasn’t always taking responsibility for my actions. I wasn’t looking within to see the source for things; I was addressing the cause. Just like there is a symptom and a cause, and a cause and effect, it’s about taking responsibility.
Even after getting my license suspended, I still didn’t stop to reflect. I kept moving fast until one day…
I was introduced to, and looking at this over and over, it became so clear:
My inner state shaped my outer reality.
What I thought was my “perception” was shaping my life.
I don't think Coach ever intended for us to project onto another person to “Do Right,” as I thought I was always doing. Now that some years have passed, I see more clearly how my intention and actions did not always align. I'm reasonably confident that Coach’s intention was for us, when standing at a crossroads and trying to decide what to do next, to hear his voice encouraging US, me to pause for a moment before choosing my next step. There is inside each of us a space where we know best. Coach cared deeply for each of us and would never have said or asked anything that he was not trying to help us become better people. We knew that then, we know that now, sometimes it takes a while for our thinking to slow down enough to “Do Right” ourselves.
